The Internet Makes You Stupid

Another gem from Something Awful.

Every once in a while I get in a mood where anything will make me laugh. Today is not one of those days.

However, this article had me crying. Excerpts below:

I'm sure in the 60's when the only form of TV entertainment was Hee-Haw, the moon landings were pretty exciting, but the only thing NASA has successfully done since then was to turn a teacher into an expensive firework

and...

Now with the recent launch of a billion dollar Battlebot on Mars that will probably get snagged on a Martian rock or smashed by a random hammer, we should really start asking ourselves, "Is it worth it?"

Let's try this

This is a test to see if I can share cam phone pictures/audio with random people over the internet.

UPDATE: Muahahahahaha! It works - expect more and more video-blogging to come. Fun fun fun.

Damn you MyDoom!

Today was day #3 of the computers being down. No file servers, no print servers, no work - for THREE DAYS. My co-workers are the biggest bunch of slackers - I think they spent the last couple days just shooting the shit in the hallways. Personally, I was taking the chance to re-organize and train analysts. Management was 500% pissed off at everyone just sitting around not doing anything, and even AFTER they came by and bitched people out for not working, as soon as they left, people just went back to what they were chatting about, like nothing happened. I swear, the work ethic here sucks.

In any case, shit loads for me to catch up on, and looks like I'm heading out to Vegas next week for work AND play, which should be fun.

More to come later.

UPDATE: So, after two days down, we got the all the computers fixed. Turn them back on, good to go. Fast forward 3 hours "Turn your computers off, the virus is back.

Some ASSHOLE opened the fucking virus A-GAIN! I left for the day.

On the way home from the bar....

(which are all located in the malls, I might add) - I happen to catch a "Sharper Image" employee zipping around, on what later turns out to be... (duh duh duh!) a SEGWAY!

First of these mofo's I've seen "live". Neat. Impractical, but neat.

Weirdo on Segway

Here are some pictures, before and after.

September 2002, a truck makes a left hand turn in forn of me while I am riding my motorcycle. I ran into the side of the truck leading with my right elbow and it "exploded"...that's the technical term that my surgeon used anyhow, you know, smart, Doctor talk. So the elbow was put back together again by my kick ass Osteopathic Surgeon (Dr. Covarrubias) using bone putty, two pins and some wires.
About 18 months later, time to get that hardware out of my body.
It was a quick outpatient surgery that lasted about 40 minutes. In total, I got to the surgery center at 6:15am, into surgery at 7am, woke up from general anesth. at 7:40, in and out of sleep until about 8:45, up and dressed and out the door by 9am. After a big glass of OJ, a bagel and some coffee, off to bed for a 5 hour nap. :) IT was a fantastic, anesthetic and pain medication induced, dead to teh world drooling all over my pillow sleep. It was fantastic. I Should be able to function decently tomorrow. Modern medicine trips me out, it is absolutely amazing. Good stuff.
P's arm pre surgery #2
P's arm post surgery #2
Shit removed from arm
More shit removed from arm

(not so) random props - Aleda

Check 'em out. Music here. Lyrics here.

Chirac be damned

First paragraph says it all.

Documents from Saddam Hussein's oil ministry reveal he used oil to bribe top French officials into opposing the imminent U.S.-led invasion of Iraq."

Surgery was a success!

I'm sure he'll be posting pictures later of the hardware they removed from his arm.

But, Pat's back - feeling a little tired, but no worse for wear. Looks like he was even able to goof on the docs trying to goof on him:

IM convo:

Pat: when i was waiting/getting prepped (IV in, etc)
Pat: my surgeon walks in, waves and says
Pat: So, what do w have this morning, sex change?
Pat: i was like, yeah, make me a man

Heh.

Spring offensive in Pakistan?

Trace route: Instapundit > Black Five > Dan Drezner

Looks like the press has "leaked" a potential "US Invasion" of Pakistan come spring, in order to catch/kill Bin Laden. Actually, less an "invasion", and more of a "presence", but moving on...

These bloggers talk about a variety of items, the main theme being "the Sun Times shouldn't have reported this, they're endangering US soldiers lives". If it's true (that we're sending troops to Pakistan, then, yeah, I agree). OTOH maybe this throws me in the "conspiracy theory" camp, but maybe, just maybe, the gov't WANTS/REQUESTED that the Sun Times file this report - especially given the particularly canned response from the author of the article - as seen in Black Five's write up.

Let's look at the situation:
A US presence in Pakistan would be suicide for Musharraf. Check
There have been attempts on Musharraf's life lately (two that I know of). Check
These attacks (if not staged to garner more US support) scare the US. Check
Musharraf has previously said that the US will not ever put troops on Paki soil. Check
Going back on his word would discredit him among his military ranks. Check
The military is the only "power" Musharraf has. Check
We have a Presidential election coming up. Check

OK, all those points argue *against* the placing any kind of projectible force on the ground in Pakistan IMVHO.

However, with that General (too lazy to re-look up his name) making calls like "We'll have OBL before year end", and the assassination attempts as cover, maybe we already know where bin laden and his top lieutenants are. We know we can't go in and full-on get him b/c of the tribal presences in that region, so who's to say we don't just send some Spec Ops guys in to scare a few AQ feebs who'll report back to "the boss", get OBL thinkin the cavalry is right over the horizon and flush him out where we hit him with a MOAB or something. Heh.

Sounds like that would be a classic play, and much more in sync with where military strategy (what I can make of it) is headed - heavier reliance on psy- and spec-ops. Guys like Rummy and Wolfowitz would just assume overthrow governments (or whatever) with as few troops/presence as possible (as we saw in Iraq - supply lines stretched thin, heavier reliance on SpecOp forces on the ground, etc.). The cost (in lives, $$, morale) of moving large groups of troops around is burdensome, as we've also seen in Iraq "aftermath".

I simply cannot see our strategists making a dumb move like this.

Cracka say WHAT?!?!

IM convo from about 2 seconds ago:

MikeB: dude...my boss was telling me today how he used to work in a prison. he said that the inmates used to fold a matress in half with a glove filled with lub of some sort in the middle.....then they would proceed to bang it. They called this contracption a "Suzy"
MikeB: i will fold you in half and put a glove in the middle of you is what i am getting at
MikeB: and call you suzy

ROFLMAO

A reasonable Palestinian you say?

Here's one. This guy was a card-carrying member of the PLO - even tried to kill an Israeli soldier once - then saw "the light", and just how ignorant he was. Now, his family members want to kill him.

Terrorists

So, I'm sitting at work reviewing this new form one of our investors requires borrowers sign, in order to get a loan.

Check how they word this:

Have you ever been identified, or are you presently identified, on the list of specifically designated nationals and blocked persons subject to financial sanctions that is maintained by the U.S. Treasury Department Office of Foreign Assets Control?

For those of you who don't know what that means, they're flat out asking if you are a terrorist! LOL - Awesome.

Al "the body" Franken?

WTF. All I know is if that hippy tried to touch me (let alone tackle me), he'd get "five across the eyes" and it wouldn't be pretty.

Blockbuster rental?

$5 says you will NEVER see this movie at Blockbuster.

Trailer here.

File this under: "PFD" (pretty fucking disturbing) and/or "Holy shit that's evil".

Paid a visit to the doc this morning

After waiting about 45 minutes in the "ready room", I approached the woman at the front desk to tell her that next time I call, and they tell me I can see the doc "right away", I'd request they keep their promise. Oops. Apparently they forgot about me.

Doc shows up, I explain the symptoms, tell him about the rash etc etc. They do a throat culture, get the results back 5 minutes later - not strep. Hmm. Given the onset and extent of the rash, Doc feels I've got a "very aggressive throt infection" - prescription: 5 day zithromax and cortisone for the rash.

Sweet. So, here I am today, working from home. Very un-exciting stuff, at least I can run around in my underwear all day. Or at least until P or L come home. hehe.

Not.safe.for.work

JIC you didn't read the title, this link is not safe for work.

A few things:
1) God bless Norway.
2) This guys wife, is literally, one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen on the internet. And that's sayin something.
3) Maybe you've heard of Perfect 10 the magazine, well, the girls on this site make those girls look like the 90 year old toothless homeless woman on the street corner.
and finally
4) God bless Norway.

Are you well-travelled?

Neat.



create your own visited states map
or write about it on the open travel guide

I've got strep

So, yeah, I think I'm 99% sure I've got strep throat. Within 24 hours of my throat starting to feel crummy, I break out in this rash that's slowly spreading across my body.

Sweet.

Personally, I'd never heard of getting a rash w/ strep throat (until a couple weeks ago), so I hope I don't have SARS or some shit. :-/ I mention "a few weeks ago" b/c my gf had this same thing (rash w/ strep), thanks babe! lol, KIDDING!

But, I'm going to the doc tomorrow. Bleh.

Humility. Get some.

I.can't.dance.

Some of the best "popping" I've ever seen. This 'ish is NUTS.

Fun in the desert

More to follow. I've got a friend "re-sizing" my .avi files so they are manageable on this blog - right now they're 8 and 9 megs respectively. Oof.

Notably, that was this, with two mods:

1) lefty config (safety/de-cocker moved to opposite side)
2) match trigger (reduces trigger pull, and adds adjustable trigger mech for faster double-taps)

Three notes:
1) You're gonna need Quick Time to view that vid
2) The shitty quality is due to that clip being shot from the video camera on my cell phone.
3) Never mind the "Howard-Deanesque" yelp at the end. I don't know who the fuck that crazy kid is anyway. Hah. ;)

UPDATE: Yet another pic - what a fun table, eh?
From bottom to top those are a pre-ban AK-47 (my favorite), my .45, and that not-so-fat-kid is shooting a savage arms .223, outfitted with a police-issue sniper barrel and sniper scope. For reference, one guy was hitting 9" balloons at 300 (laser ranged) yards, in 25+ mph winds, on his first shot with that firearm.

Evil. Simply evil.

Random thought

Who needs colonics, when we have mexican food?

Mental note: No more mexican for lunch, my stomach is doing the damn cha-cha.

Back in the gym

And I'm still shaking. Let's just say I haven't been in the gym in at least a solid two months. Went back last night with my buddy who's a trainer, and he beat on me for a solid two hours. oof. Chest and tri's. Two hours. Count 'em folks - 120 minutes. Ug. In any case, the simple act of typing on the computer has got me shakey, let alone doing anything else I have to do today.

Good stuff. I would be going back for back, shoulders and bi's tonight, but I've got dinner with a buddy who just got back from Iraq, that I also grew up with back east. And, uh, P, I gotta see if we can potentially get another ticket to that comedy show tonight. Hehe.

Funny google search

That my blog shows up on.

I get the funny feeling you might be having guy troubles.

LOL

Its the economy, stupid

Economists Say Recession Started in 2000:

"'Presidents don't have so much to do, in my opinion, with when recessions start,' Zarnowitz said. 'Clearly the boom happened under Clinton, and the boom generates the bust. And no administration has the power to change that.'"

So much for the "blame the economy on bush" crowd.

Sorry cocksnugglers.

So weak

So, I was all excited about being able to take pictures off my computer and send them to my phone. Got two pictures done, then the service mysteriously stopped working. Shit. Have sent 2-3 emails to the guy who created the uploader, have yet to get a response. So, I called sprint, and reported this "data error 907" - sat on hold for 20 minutes, then got some guy who sort of knew what he was talking about. I explained to him what I was doing, only to have him tell me that Sprint has "blocked" that site, b/c of potential copyright infringement.

What the fuck?!?

Apparently if I take a picture of a copyrighted picture with my phone and start passing it around with my phone, Sprint is somehow liable for that. Sounds like some sort of Kazaa type shit, which is also garbage. But, thats not what I'm doing. I'm taking pictures with MY DAMN CAMERA and want to upload them to MY DAMN PHONE. What the flying fuck is the problem with this?!?!

As much as I can't argue with the guy (he's an IT peon answering phones) I DO think it's complete bullshit that if I take pictures on my own personal camera and want to put them on my cell phone, that sprint is telling me that I can't - b/c that is EXACTLY what's going on here.

Weak.fucking.sauce.

Best away message.

At least of the last 10 minutes:

There's nothing funny about Garfield. Every single comic starts out the same: Garfield sits around being fat, he eats all the food, and his ambiguously gay owner yells at him: The cat eats food. Alright, WE GET IT. Move on. Then as if to piss all over our better judgement, Davis has received the National Cartoonist Society: Best Humor award. Twice. Garfield gets awarded for humor and "Family Guy" keeps getting canceled faster than a baby at Planned Parenthood. That reminds me of how much I hate babies. Why does everyone want to save them? There are too many babies. I'm not saying we should kill them, but if you happen to be giving your baby a bath and the phone rings.. well, nobody will judge you. Besides, you might get free brownies out of it at the funeral, and brownies rule

Ef Sprint AND Yahoo!

My buddy just referred me to this site for a Sprint PCS Vision File Uploader. So, if you've got a sprint phone, and want to take pics from your computer and send them to your phone, you can now do it for free. Ef paying sprint $5/month or Yahoo! $10/month. This thing takes your pictures and sends you an SMS message with a link to your pic, then you simply DL it!

KICK ASS! Thanks Finn!

Some perspective from an Aussie living in the US

They like Bush, and they are not stupid.

Headline says it all folks. I'm no sap, but this article choked me up.

More from ECM over at BT

This guy rocks out with his cock out. How he manages to keep his composure getting some of these completely ignorant asshatted responses is beyond me.

In any case, this whole video is pretty boring, up until the very last comment - where I couldn't decide whether I should 1) laugh 2) cry or 3) take my HK and go hunt the guy down and shoot him in the stomach.

I'd buy one

These glasses are being marketed as a lie-detector, but read up on some of the other neat uses, and let your imagination run wild. It's like a magic truth syrum, just ask the right question... very very very cool.

Dean's goose is cooked

I'm literally crying after watching this video of Howard Dean in a full on tirade.

And, on a more serious note: Who's next?

I'm 99% convinced that I don't have to do any more Dean bashing, b/c, let's admit it folks, in order to win the presidency, you have to win the heart lands - Dean's rash of blow ups, combined with his anxiety attacks when presented with responsibility are just going to see more and more light as time (and this "race") march along.

I'm kind of thinking Kerry is the new front runner, regardless that he won the Iowa thing. With Clark starting to bash Kerry's military record we should see some more mud-slinging from the Kerry camp, but I think Kerry will come out ahead. His potential waffling points are his support (and subsequent) for UN Resolution 1441, which he has since back tracked on, being so easily "duped" by our President. My questions is, if our President can dupe him, how hard is it going to be for the Chinese or the Koreans? Bzzt - Wrong answer Haughty French Looking Guy from Massachusetts who, by the way, also served in Vietnam.

I guess Clark could come out and lead some polls, but the guy's too much of an idiot to do much permanent damage. Plus, he got fucking FIRED from the UN's top position after he tried to start WW3 with the Russians. I'm sure we'll be hearing more about that in the coming weeks.

Honestly, I dont know much about the other candidates, which probably means they won't win. Hmph.

It is interesting noticing how the media is approaching all the "press reactions" - they really DO want a horse race.

Blogroll's working again!

Big thanks to Johvan for diggin through my code to figure out that I'm an idiot. Hah! Looks like titles for blogs in my blogroll can't be more than 8 words. And if they are, well, your blog roll suicides itself. Hmph.

In any case, light blogging lately for a number of reasons. Too much shit to do at work, too much shit to do at home, and the weather's been too damn nice to spend much time inside.

I would be posting more pics from my kick ass camera phone - if the sprint whore-gods weren't trying to charge me an extra $5 / month for the priveledge. I'm still gonna sign up for it, b/c it's fun, but it's pretty shitty of them to give you the service free for like 2 FUCKING DAYS then just cut it off like that. Weak sauce.

Hope all is well with all you guys. If any of you have "blog banners" that you'd like me to link to, email them to me. Johvan showed me how to set one up - so "Milblogs" is my first.

Comments are back mofo!

This time, hosted by Haloscan, which seems like a cool enough site, minus the fact they have some shit-dick advertising on their front page (something about not enough "hate bush" bumper stickers in America.

In any case, they say I shouldn't have lost any comments, so I'll have to go check that out. I'm also interested to see how the GUI is with this new program - it's a LOT less customizable than Blogspeak ever was. Not that I used the customization, but, you know, if I had a good looking blog I might have been interested.

Heh.

And one for the ladies

A new fandangled stimulator for your "hard to stimulate" woman.

Heh. Only $139.99. Maybe I should import these things to the US - should work great for all the lazy slob guys out there, "Here honey, hook yourself up to this car battery/jumper cable get up - I'll be back in 20 minutes when you're 'warmed up'".

LOL.

File this under: Too lazy to fuck.

Looks like Al Gore is a douche too

Al Gore's Speech on Bush and the Environment is Demagoguery. Hah.

This guy systematically shreds Mr. Gore's "Global Warming" policy speech, made in NYC earlier today.

Awesome.

UPDATE: Realizing not too many people know what a "demagogue" is.

Don't dare call me mysogynist

That was from a NoFX song, but this is just fucking funny.

Thanks Thrak!

Carol Mosley Braun

Is it just me, or does nobody give a fuck?

Ef brazil

Well, doesn't look like I'll be going to Brazil any time soon.

Apparently these tools don't realize that THEY have a problem, and we're trying to protect ourselves from it. Maybe if their government wasn't so effing corrupt (or could manage their finances) they wouldn't be so bent about being our perverbial "bitch".

No tourist dollars from this gringo will be going to Brazil - that's for DAMN sure.

UPDATE: Found a picture of the pilot. Gobbless him.

My drive in this morning

Well, since Chad is off and busy doing "Army Stuff", I guess I might have to fill in with some random camera phone photos (now that I've got one). If only I took public transportation, I'd have a lot more entertaining shots - for now, you're gonna have to deal with shots from my commute. lol.



UPDATE: Ew, I just realized that shit brown layer on the horizon, is smog. Oof - welcome to CA.

Oh so disturbing

Oh.my.God.

Further proof that there is no God, and that some people simply deserve to be summarily executed.

File this under: Where the fuck is PETA when you need 'em?

UPDATE: OWNED

My new phone owns

Check this thing out.

30 second vid clips
Zoom-able camera
Walkie talkie shit
BLACK

Uber-cool.

Fuck LG phones

My cell phone just committed hari-kari mid-call to my friend who I haven't talked to in 4 months, and is going back to Iraq (second time) in a month.

Fuck. I'm off to go get ass-raped at best buy for a new phone.

Fun.

Fuck YES!

Just got put in charge of our team for the next 3 days while all the "team leaders" are out of te office! This, over the "more experienced" underwriter we pulled from Freddie Mac.

My team leader just yanked me in his office, and gave me the speech: "You're the most experienced person on this team, there are a lot of things you know that I don't even know. I'm leaving you in charge of everyone - I'm instructing them, if they have any questions, to come to you first."

Fuck yeah bitches! Hahahah. This, after I set my goal of getting more management experience this year, and with the hope of a seque to "team leader" within the next 6-9 months.

I'm.fucking.STOKED!

Grover Norquist? Huh?

Shamelessly poached from Allah, here is a kick ass article about the GOP's "grass roots" man - Grover Norquist.

Very interesting stuff, if you analyze the techniques he's applying to politital strategy. Plus, I gotta admire any guy that can work 18 hours a day. Insane.

Comments, we don't need no stinking comments jefe!

Well folks, this explains why my comments aren't working.

Wicked pissa.

If anyone has "alternative" suggestions for free "comments" providers, which are newb friendly, please advise. Email would be the best route: musingsofafatkid @ yahoo.

Thanks!

NSFW?

This link got IMed to me at work today.

Quite possibly the most pleasantly surprising IM I've ever gotten. Again, note the NSFW title of this post. Technically it isn't, but, it is. You'll know what I'm talking about later.

Dave gets a computer

Looks like Mango made his own compu-der. Good shit, looks pretty damn evil too.

I was tryin to figure out just how much memory he's got on that thing - is it a terabyte that's the next step up from a gigabyte? If so, Dave's got over a quarter terabyte on that thing - lmao. WTF.

Chads last day of work

Great post over at dogtulosba. Chad's leaving for "active duty" service tomorrow. All of me over at MOFK wish you the best of luck, and ask that you don't forget about the (not so) little people!

Kick ass man, and keep in touch.

I hate cacti

Just back from the 2nd MTB ride this weekend. Let's just say it's been a weekend of pretty bad luck.

Yesterday, within 1/4 mile of the parking lot (on the way back) my buddy took a digger on about a 25 mph downhill right hander. Fortunately, he wasn't injured, no blood, no mess - however, 5 minutes later, when we got to the car, what do I see but a fucking $64 parking ticket on my windshield.

Shit.

I had the $5 in my pocket to get the sticker, and simply forgot. Booo.

Then, today, out for a nice ride - I went up this long mother fucker hill the fastest I ever have. You know those times when you're working so hard you want to puke? Yeah, that was me, half way up. Heh. Kept going though, suffered it out and kicked some ass. Good times.

Then, on the way down another trail, I've got these new tubeless tires, so I'm getting used to what the tread can and cannot handle, and apparently the tires couldn't handle this one, loose, off camber turn at the speed I was carrying, so they shot me wide. Into a cactus. Hahahahah. My left ring finger is nice and swollen, and had about 15 inch long needles sticking out of it, my left knee caught some too, with about the same number of needles. Heh. Picking those things out is a bitch.

Well, hope everyone's having a great weekend. For all you east coast bitches, it's about 75 deg out here, and sunny. Heard wind chill back home was negative 18 the other day - LMAO.

Company Christmas party photos are out

Let me just say: I.work.with.trolls.

I'm seriously conflicted here folks. I could give you access to this album, and you would (guaranteed) laugh your balls off. Then again, 1) you'd get to see what I look like and 2) I'm not sure how stoked the people I work with would be getting their faces spread all over the 'net.

Help me decide! lol

#2!

I'm num-ber two, I'm num-ber two! That means, only one more spot to go on my "Howard Dean is a douche" countdown, before I'm #1!

Check it.

Armed robbery? Why bother?

Granted, security cameras take pictures every other second or something, but still, this is one fast punch.

Sucks to be that chick.

Great link to a guns article over at Patricks blog

Linky here.

Getting up early

Got up at 0600 this morning to go for a bike ride. Had my first bout of "second thoughts" as soon as I stepped outside and felt a 30-some odd degree day. Damn. Got my shit together, got psyched up and took the Epic out. Did about a 7-8 mile loop, which consisted of a solid couple mile climb (at least it felt like it - the climb was 90% of the time of the ride - 45 minutes).

Most of you know I live in SoCal (and if you didn't, you've now seen the light) - well folks, there was ICE on the road. Where ever there was water run off from sprinkers - ice, water in the gutters down the hill - ice. Holy shit. Of course, as soon as the sun came up, it went away, but not before then. lol

Gonna try and keep this up - I desperately need to modify my sleep cycle from this "go to bed at 2, wake up (painfully) at 7" which is exhausting. Getting to sleep at 10 last night was kind of difficult, but I think I can ease into it. :)

To my favorite mormon:

Happy Birthday ya bum! Rum's on me next time we meet up!

Our Governments spending spree, mixed with entitlement programs

Granted, a bunch of euro-weenies from the laughable International Monetary Fund (IMF) came up with this report, but if there is any truth to the below quote.... we're fucked:

"But the IMF researchers said that won't be enough to address the government's long-term fiscal problems - including financing the Social Security and Medicare programs over the next 75 years. In their report, they said the government faces a $47 trillion shortfall in its ability to pay for those and all other long-term obligations. Closing that gap would require 'an immediate and permanent' federal tax increase of 60% or a 50% cut in Social Security and Medicare benefits. "

File this under: Ouch.

I'm useless: FFX-2 is going to be the end of me

For those of you who don't know me, I'm a big effing PS2 RPG dork (playstation 2 role-playing game). My favorite being Final Fantasy X - which I spent about 244 logged hours playing. You can beat the game (and I did) in about 100 - and I played an additional 144 hours of "getting extra shit". (Which I never did complete I might add)

For instance, just look at all the shit they have over at GameFAQs, for FFX. Jeesus.

In any case, I went out and bought the one true sequel in the Final Fantasy series - FFX-2 and O.M.F.G. am I in a world of trouble.

Every time you get one of these games you have to learn a whole new interface, and all the other bullshit that goes along with a new game. Typically it takes me anywhere between 10 minutes (for most games) to 4-5 hours with the FF series games to get decent at handling the characters and figuring shit out intuitively. This game is giving me aneurisms. Not so much from the complexity to do stuff, b/c I think I've got that figured out, but there are literally ENDLESS possibilities as to how you can build your characters up. My jaw dropped when I finally started getting a feel for how layered the game is going to be. Keep in mind I've only got about an hour of "play time" in it.

From what I can tell so far, the game looks pretty badass. Great graphics, interesting concept (if you played FFX1) and whatever else you could ask for. The only downside is the 10 second lag between scene changes. Anyone know if you can get RAM upgrades for PS2's? Seriously.

I've come to the conclusion that, yes, I really am a dork.

Hah.

Alan Greenspan rocks

It's so refreshing to see this guy stuff his cock in the face of european economists, fully knowing his track record (and philosophy) beats the pants off theirs.

Hah.

Google bomb test

Click away!

Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
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Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
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Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
Howard Dean is a douche
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Where do Dean's priorities lay?

Seems like he's more concerned with keeping his gubernatorial records safe than security plans for his states nuclear reactor.

LOL.

The more shit that comes about about him, the more he looks like a babe lost in the woods.

Say it with me folks (lemme feeeeeeel the love): Howard Dean is a douche.

UPDATE: In fact, it doesn't sound like any of them have the slightest clue what they're talking about. Laugh or cry, laugh or cry, laugh or cry - help me decide.

Whoa, Chad go Buh-bye in 5 days??

Looks like my man Chad, over at dogtulosba, ink. has only got 5 more days before he goes "active" in the Army.

Sorry that I'm just catchin this now Chad, never really waited for that counter to load. :/

In any case, best of luck to ya. I'd have to imagine you'll be pretty busy for a while, but inquiring minds want to know, will you continue to blog? I sure hope so.

And, forgot to mention, I met some funny liberals from Seattle when I was back in NYC. Lemme tell you, they simply LOVED the fact I was a member of the NRA, owned a hand gun, think Howard Dean is a douche bag, Clinton is scum, Bush is a damn fine President and I don't think anyone else has a right to my hard earned money. Great dinner conversation. lol

What in the...

This guy must've been REALLY shit-faced.

How, in the process of moving your car 10 yards, do you cause 150,000 pounds of damage, and flip another car on its' roof?

LOL.

A couple gems from ScrappleFace

For those of you who don't read this guys site, start. It friggin cracks me up. I'd love to link every article, but then I'd just be some lame mirror site. Heh.

Dean's Favorite New Testament Book is Bhagavad-Gita (an offshoot of my "Howard Dean is a Douche" campaign)

U.S. Begins Hoofprinting Canadian Cows at Border - and this is just silly... ... ... or is it? Terrorist cows, I've seen stranger things.

Spotlight on CA: Illegal Immigrants

This an excerpt from today's edition of Nealz Nuze regarding Bush's (what I hope will be still-born) plan regarding the potential legalization of illegal immigrants - a proposed amnesty program in essence. Overall, a bad idea.

And speaking of votes, my friends. Did you know that there are many areas in this country where non-citizens can vote? It all started with local school board elections. Apologists for the non-citizens will argue "they're sending their children to our public schools, they should have a right to vote in school board elections." Next will be "well, they're working here and paying taxes, so they should have a right to vote in local elections." The final move will be "hey, they're paying income taxes. They're contributing to our economy. They should have a right to vote in federal elections.

Slippery slope, yeah. Slippery slope fallacy, maybe not. Those of us in CA witnessed Gray Davis' last minute "olive branch" to minority voters with his "drivers licenses for illegals" campaign - and it actually (interestingly) backfired on him. The people who immigrated here LEGALLY don't want their hard-earned tax dollars going to illegal immigrants. Why should I feel any different? In any case, something definitely has to be done about the sheer number of illegals here. Immigration is a great thing, but, like with everything else, in moderation. The real point boils down to (in my mind) - if you're going to come here, take advantage of our system, at least go through the proper channels. Sneaking over the border, then claiming that you're entitled to all sorts of bullshit is beyond the pale in my book.

So, about that vacation

First off, let me say that I love direct flights. OK, done. LAX to Beantown in just about 5.5 hours - not too shabby - minus my DOUCHEBAG pilot, which is worth mentioning. So, context first, right?
1) Recent upgrade to "Code Orange"
2) Cancelled flights out of Paris and England.
3) Morning news flash that cars were not allowed into LAX due to concerns regarding terrorist threats

OK, mood is set. 99% of the flight was un-eventful, until the final approach to Boston. Pilot comes on the PA, announcing that we're in a holding pattern due to an un-market flight traveling up and down the eastern seaboard, who has been "wreaking havoc with air traffic controllers all evening". Oh. Fuck. Of course I start looking for the first middle-eastern asshole on the flight to see who I'm going to have to kill. In any case, next thing you know, the pilot yells "HERE HE COMES!" and jerks the plane right, then a quick left. I shit you not. Must've been a 75 ft lateral move, then correction. I looked out the window so fast I almost got fucking WHIPLASH. Pilot back on the intercom, "Well folks, that was a close call, looks like that guy only had one running light on - a red one - right in front". Fucking Santa Clause. This asshole thought that was gonna be a funny joke. *shakes head*

Now, back to the weather fat kid.

Guess I got lucky (a few weeks ago Boston had 18" of snow or some shit) b/c the weather was about 60 for the first few days I was around. As you can see from the pictures in this post, the weather was a little overcast, but pretty damn nice.

I spent most of my time at home just readin and shootin the shit with the 'rents. Total book tally for week 1 was four I think:

1) Welcome to the Monkey House. Favorite story was, "Harrison Bergeron". You know it's gonna be good when the story's opening paragraph starts:
"The year was 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren't only equal before God and the law. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. All this equality was due to the 211th, 212th and 213 Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilence of agents o fthe United States Handicapper General."

Hah! Soooo badass....

2) Every Second Counts. I think Lance Armstrong is the most bad-ass athlete of our AGE, let alone the gay-ass "Sportsman of the Year" award SI heaps on him whenever A-Rod is having a bad day. For you doubters out there, try holding his AVERAGE speed for 2,500 miles through the alps pyrenees etc, for one hour. $5 says you can't.

3) The Davinci Code. Cool book my 'rents recommended. Some interesting shit questioning the foundation for the Catholic Church, which is always entertaining.

4) From a Buick 8. A recent work of Stephen King (the master), which, frankly, sucked ass. I'm a HUGE fan of the Dark Tower series, and considering 90% of EVERYTHING King has ever written is "part" of that series, I'm a big fan of most everything he writes. This book was not, though that wasn't the only reason it sucked.

So, in between reading all these books, the only time spent with college friends was @ a house-warming/holiday party for my good friend Doug. Met up with a few folks I hadn't seen pretty much since Dougs wedding, about 18 months ago. :/ Good times, and the Harpoon Winter Warmer was flowing (the best damn beer on the market FYI).

The next night I actually got out for an awesome dinner in Bostons "North End" - the "ital" part of town. Had a pretty kick ass salmon dish at that, though the mussels were a little lacking.

Not much between then and new years in NYC. Highlights of NYC were my buddy Rob hooking up with this (I swear to God) Denise Richards look alike - she wasn't *actually* a look alike, b/c that would be tacky, but this chick was HOT, and resembled her something FIERCE. Good shit. OK, yeah, that was a bad link, but how hot is the pic? Heh. Here's a better face shot. *sighs*

Not much to report after that besides my contracting a cold, and an uneventful flight back home. I won't bore ya with details folks, but let's just say, I'm glad to be back in sunny/warm SoCal.

Catch you tramps around.

Where's PETA?

Looks like china is planning on euthanizing over 10,000 "cats" in order to stem the spread of SARS.

Where's the outrage, why isn't PETA staging protests on the mainland?

File this under: The pesky "freedom of speech" thing.

Update: Thanks Chad - lol. That sure is a lotta pussy. Heh.

Trip home

Some pictures from my hometown, taken Christmas Day.

Effing breathtaking. All images have been resized to 50% to save space.

The coastline.

Marblehead lobster.

Sunset.

And another sunset.

My ass is BACK!

(In one piece I might add.)

I'll have to admit - I didn't get a post in yesterday for a few reasons. The first being I'd rather hang out with my gf, heh. The second being, so much went on, I have no idea where to start.

So, for all you waiting with baited breath, expect probably a flurry of posts throughout the day. For, it looks like work isn't going to be as busy as I expect (I just jinxed it, I know) and putting together one post would tax your fragile little brains.

UPDATE: Holy effing shit. I kid you not. I stopped typing that LAST sentence b/c someone came into my office. Only to drop off 1/2 the shit I've been missing for the last 2 weeks. lol. Given the current conditions, expect periodic blogging with light subject fare, maybe a few pics. Heh.