Travel plans gone awry

So, I arrange my travel to LAX for my flight home. Shuttle picking me up at 9:30 AM for a 1:10 PM flight. Should be OK, right? *BZZZT* I turn on the TV this morning, "get there 3+ hours early... FOR A DOMESTIC FLIGHT" - and they're not even letting individual cars in - you gotta come in in a shuttle/taxi, or you don't get in.

Fuck.

Why do I get the feeling I'm TOTALLY gonna miss my flight. This sucks.

In any case, have a great holiday folks. I might be out of commission till January 3rd if all goes well. But, if I do get bored, I'll be blogging. So, until next time...

So, kinda funny story from yesterday

Last Friday I went out for a "team dinner" at a local italian restaurant (niiiiiiiiice place). Being the italian food snob that I am, and not seeing my favorite dish (veal saltimbocca) I asked our server to see if the chef had any idea what it was. As an alternative, I ordered the lasagna. Well, I got the saltimbocca, and it was a close second for "best I've ever had" - which is saying a lot.

Well, as I liked it so much, I came back in on Monday AM and was telling someone about "one of the best damn veal dishes I've ever had" - when this groan eminates from behind me.

Now, I know my stomach makes noises b/c of my ulcer, but, this was no stomach. I turn around to see our new admin giving me the vegetarian "stare of death". I immediately start to laugh, knowing full well what this is about, and pose the question, "What are you, a vegan?" - followed by more laughing on my part. Go ahead, guess the response, it was something like, "Actually. Yes."

With 200% surety, this was headed downhill. Fast. I decided to nip in in the bud and told her that it wasn't even 9:00 yet, and I most certainly was NOT getting in this conversation with her over something as asinine as her dietary preferences. She went for the rebuttal, "Do you know how they TREAT those baby cows?", and I walked away. Laughing some more. And as a parting shot, I sent her a link from our friend over at maddox.xmission.

Yes, I know I'm a bastard. I'm over it, why aren't you? :P

"Ooh baby baby it's a wild world"

So, ever been just surfing porn 'cause you're bored, and you find someone you know in one of the video's? Me neither, until about 15 minutes ago...

You decide if I'm right. I'm like 95%, my friend isn't convinced:

Real deal (SFW)

Assumed 1 (NSFW) -- bottom banner, right hand side.
Assumed 2 (NSFW) -- click the first vid titled "cassie".

File this under: It's a small world after all...

Is this what "being a dork" feels like?

If so, this sucks, and I need to do something about it.

In case you were wondering, I'm sitting here at home doing the following:
1) blogging @ 9:30 PM
2) eating mac & cheese
3) with tuna
3a) and hot sauce
4) drinking a semi-decent cab
5) bored out of my mind
6) missing my girlfriend (haha, no link suckers)
7) needing to sleep, and contemplating going to bed before 2:30 AM (for the first time in about a week)

Bring on the pr0n.

Fun with referrer logs

Today's new blog (to me) is that of lagmonkey. In all my blogroll trolling, I haven't yet come across him - which is a bad thing.

His is more of a traditional blog as far as I can tell - more personal type items. He looks pretty cool to me, spent some time as a Marine - though I'm not sure that goatee is kosher (which most likely means he's out), looks like he listens to some cool music, and he's got me linked with the likes of Anna (Primal Purge) and Kim DuToit, which means he's no fan of Chomsky. Heh.

Gonna have to check that site out more.

Oh yeah, and his format kicks the shit out of mine. Hah.

Watch out for the bathtub

Caught this link off a message board I troll.

Electricity much?

File this under: Oh.my.fucking.God.

Turning and turning in the widening gyre

The falcon cannot hear the falconer
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold...


Excerpt from "The Second Coming", by W.B. Yeats, one of my favorite Irish poets.

Aaah yes

The beauty of innocence lost.
1) Yes, who the ef designed that? Reeks of NAMBLA to me. lol
and the, what should be, obvious question
2) What parent puts their kid on it, and gets a PICTURE of it.

Unless of course, they're going to hold the picture as blackmail for some wedding day. If that's the case, that's pretty damn funny.

EDIT: Or as my astute reader so graciously pointed out, NADGLA (North American Duck Girl Love Association) would be more appropos. Heh.

EDIT 2: On reflection, that would make one funny-ass blog name. It's mine you thieves! Muahahahaha. Chad gets royalties of $.01. :P

No mp3 uploads?

Well folks, you can't say I didn't try. I found one of my all time "happy songs" this weekend, and wanted to share it with you, but alas, it wasn't to be. The Blogger gods apparently don't like either 1) .mp3 file extensions being shared, 2) being sued by the RIAA, 3) DCMA or 4) 7 meg uploads. Heh.

In any case, if you're so inclined, and have Kazaa lite or bear share or some other p2p hookup - go check out "VNV Nation - beloved". There are only a few songs that simply make me *happy*, and this is one of them.

*sighs*

Google search: religious zealot

Someone want to tell me why the fuck Pikachu shows up in this google search before Mohammed Atta or even Jesse Jackson?

I find this disturbing.

Bin Laden's got something right

Looks like Mr. Penis Breath himself has a new video tape out. Now that you've read that, go re-read that interview with "grimley" from LOTR fame.

Demographics are where its at, and it really is going to be a "clash of the civilizations". The only question is my mind is "when" the powder keg will ignite. Bin Laden hoped 9/11 would serve as catalyst to those ends, I think it was only the lighting of the wick. This "war on terror" isn't going to end in any of our lifetimes for a whole number of reasons. Retarded religious zealots being the #1 reason.

As Marx put it, religion is the opiate of the masses. Damn religion. Damn it to hell.

LOTR - A defense of Western Civilization

In response to this interview with "Grimley" from LOTR, I got linked to this PDF file by my R6MN buddy, 2kblueR6.

The first interview doesn't really get "good" until the last paragraph, when he starts talking about the effect of the overtly Christian ethos prevalent in the book. The most interesting point I found him talking about was his perception of the demographical change that's going to take place in Europe in the next 50-75 years. Very interesting shit, and VERY insightful given todays idiotic batch of actors/entertainers. However, that's another post for another day.

I've yet to read the second link, however I have it on good authority that it's worth a rip.

Thanks 2kblue!

Washes sins clean away

I <3 this shit.

O.M.F.G.

My office A/C WON'T.SHUT.OFF, its blowing cold air on my bald-ass head, I'm wearing short-sleeves and I'm sick already. I feel my throat fucking SEIZING up and I'm shivering my ass off.

Here, I even took a picture of my self. Brrr.

Kick ass pic of the day

From Baker Company - the last Marine Company left in Iraq.

How to show affection for your loved ones

Buy them one of these special seat cushions for the Holidays.

File this under: Why didn't I think of this and/or Patrick buy one.

Heh.

Working from home today

So, yeah, tryin to figure out if i want to go ride the MTB or motorcycle for "lunch". :)

Yes, I am sick - however I don't feel bad. But, after getting yelled at for coming to work yesterday (while being sick - we have like 5 preggo's in the office), I decided it would be better of me to bring some stuff home for today.

Amazing how much more efficient you get when people aren't swingin by the office every 5 minutes to tell you the newest joke they just heard, or asking your opinion on something.

This gal's a riot

I'll admit, fully one-half the time, I have no effing IDEA what this girl is talking about - but todays humor isn't lost even on little 'ol fat me.

Heh.

I don't think I'm a particularly "angry" person

But, I just got back from picking up lunch, and that made the second time in about 14 hours that I've come close to fighting someone over something stupid (note: about 7 of those 14 hours were spent sleeping).

Last night leaving "the last samurai" with KE some asshole in a Rav4 (or equivalent) was hauling ASS through the parking lot, people weren't quite jumping out of the way, but it was clear he wasn't slowing down/stopping for anyone. Well, he just so happened to have to slow down to round a corner and get by my walking ass. Well, he cut it really close, so what did I do, stick out my keys. Heh. I intentionally didn't try and get his car, but it was more of a gesture for the 15 other people he was trying to plow through. Well, Mr. Big Bad Ass driver didn't think it was funny, so he slammed his brakes and got out of the car. For some unknown reason my first response was to start walking towards him and say "I didn't get it asshole, get back in your car". LOL. I'd have to confirm with KE but this guy out-weighed me by probably 100 lbs, and about 6". Kept walking towards him saying "look, look" pointing accusingly. I guess this guy must've felt stupid or something b/c he got back in his car and left, and I dont think he said one word.

So, that was story one. Here is story two.

Lunch at the local mexican place. There are two registers serving customers. Ok, *every* time I've *ever* been there (approaching 100 times) one cue forms, and you simply take whichever register is first. Common courtesy in large line venues IMO. Well, I'm next in line, and some dude comes charging over to register two - right in front of me. So, I inform him that there's a line, and he needs to get in it. He gets all confrontational with me saying, "Well I'm gonna make you choose, which line you gonna be in", and my response "I choose this one line that everyone else is in, and you're going to get behind me again". Well, we went back and forth like that for about 20-30 seconds, and I stopped him mid-sentence and said "You know what, I'm gonna let YOU be the asshole today - go ahead dick". Heh. Apparently he didn't like being called a dick, and protested some.

Net net net, he ordered his food, I winked at him when he went to pick it up - the register ladies saw the whole thing go down, and as a net result, I got my food first.

The question is, what IS it with people like that? The assholes that are in such a fucking rush that they just try and run you over, or cheat to get ahead any way possible? I don't consider myself a particularly violent person, but when people go out of their way to act like dicks, I call them on it. Worse more, these people are all show and no go. The guy from the movie was MUCH bigger than me, and backed down. I stood up to the chin on the guy at lunch today, and he had me by a good 60 lbs probably - and he didn't do shit, even after I called him names in front of a bunch of people.

Again, maybe it's just me being a dick, but the last 24 hours have been entertaining at the least.

Like a rat

Saddam Hussein is caught.

So I come home from another long night of partying (ironically showing a recently-home-from-Iraq Marine a good time in downtown laguna) only to find out that, yes, we have finally caught THE goat-fucker.

Congratulations Iraq, thank you United States.

There are so many great new/blog posts out there, I'm not even gonna bother giving my $.02 on this. All I hope is that we keep that asshole safe for his trial by the iraqi people. I'm really looking forward to the reaction of both the angry left and the international community - if what Hamas has said is any indication of anything, I think the next year should be pretty interesting. In any case, I do want to share the best photoshop I've seen to date on Saddam's capture:


And my caption: "Hey Chirac, ya like apples?"

Update: In celebration of catching Saddam, I went out and bought some champagne - 5th from the bottom. I'll take some digi pics tonight, and hopefully get them up tomorrow.

I've had a shit-eating grin on my face ALL DAY. How wonderful.

UPDATE: A pic of the oh so tasty bottle.

A parody of my job

This, via an email from earlier today. Thanks Jen!

A person is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes that they are lost. They reduce the height and spot a person on the ground below. They lower the balloon further and shout, "Excuse me. Can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The person below says, "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees North latitude and between 58 and 60 degrees West longitude."
"You must be an underwriter," says the balloonist.
"I am," replies the person below, "how did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is, I am still lost."
The person below says, "You must be a loan officer". "I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," says the person below, "you don't know where you are, or where
you are going. You have made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is, you are in exactly the same position as you were before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."

0wn3d

2004 economy

Some pics

I just ULed a couple pics from the last few days.

Sunset. Laguna Beach. PCH. Eat your heart out.

My office (as of Thursday 1900 hours - now)

Meanest motorcycle I've ever seen

Not sure if this was designed to compete with that V-10 behemoth Dodge debuted (sp?) in Vegas a couple years ago, but I think this beast has that Dodge beat in HP *and* overall mass. Stat sheet reads: 502 HP and a curb weight of 1,300 lbs.

HAH!

Missile Defense Hits Target During Test

The eyes

My god, the eyes.

Physical Therapy: II (and then some...)

The Achilles has been feelin alright for about the last week (better and better every day). THEN I went on a site inspection today up in Torrance - no big deal, just had to *walk* about 25 units, shouldn't have been a problem. Well, I don't know how I did it, but somehow I pissed off my achilles BAD walking to the *first* unit. The next two hours were spent cruising up and down flights of stairs and running all over this 10 acre property - all in all must've been about 3 miles, on the messed up leg. Oof. Went to the PT guy tonight, got my shit checked out - the tendon was all inflamed, so he stretched it out some, some more ultrasound, some more stretching, some ice, and a SICK tape job. I feel great again! Woo hoo! I've got 2 appts scheduled for next week. In any case, now, getting to what you've all been reading for: the "front desk chick". As I mentioned in my previous post, I was gonna make a conscious effort to check the left hand ring-finger to see if it was cool to chat her up. Well, lets just say I found this "true-to-scale" picture.

Bling.

DISCLAIMER: From here on in, this post gets serious, and rather grumpy. Thanks for the reminder (and the KICK ASS! "title pic" Chad!)

So, honestly, why the fuck do girls always want to get married so fuckin early? I hear the whole "biological clock" argument, but WTF. Maybe I'm just immature, but shit, I'm 25 and though I've come a *long* way since 18 in terms of relationships, however I still can't see my lame ass getting married within the next 10 years. I got too much shit to do! Between starting my real-estate empire, living in NorCal at some point, living in NYC at some point, living in TX at some point (don't ask), and spending some *serious* time in Alaska, who the fuck is gonna wanna follow my fat ass around? B/c God knows I don't see myself compromising any of my life aspirations for anyone at this point (and maybe that's the problem, eh?). Though it's nice to be "unencumbered" at times, at other times it sucks some pretty fat, hemherroid-ridden ass. I mean, I *DO* actually have a good time going camping in Yosemite by myself (for example) - which absolutely horrifies some people. Alternatively, stick me in the corner with a book and I can bop till I drop. At other times, all I want is someone to share things with - whether it be feelings, experiences, joy, pain, whatever - it's the act of sharing that's important, it's the catharsis. I guess I want someone to care and listen, but I don't want to be beholden - is that an oxymoron? As much as I say I have that with my friends, I do and I don't. Does anyone else ever wonder what your "friends" would think of you if they didn't get the "watered-down" version? I do, and I withdraw b/c most people can barely handle "fat kid light" - so I make the compromise to have some semblance of companionship - but how real is it, who am I fooling, and WHY?!? How shitty, huh. That was a rhetorical question. :b

In any case, I don't know why I went off on that tangent. I must sound like a little bitch, but damn it all if shit doesn't build up in every one of us - I guess it just takes me longer to "let it out", as it goes. "The little one" would probably laugh that I have to vent to the internet. QED I guess, hah.

Moonlighting

Over at P's place - found a fun little article that it sounds like I could have written.

Brought to you by The Onion, the favorite liberal mouth-piece of one Fat Kid.

And for those of you who didn't know me in college, 1) thank your stars and 2) the paragraph that rang home follows:

"In a healthy capitalist economy, some people are going to be out-competed," Knoep said. "I'm sorry, but some of those fuck-ups have fucked themselves. I am not condoning an anarchic 'fuck or be fucked' ethos, but I can hardly get behind a welfare state that punishes the unfucked by fucking all equally."

Looking to do some volunteer work?

This link just came across my desk, looks pretty worth while - VolunteerMatch, check it out.

Whatever happened to...

the old saying "look both ways before you cross the street". Driving in my work parking lot this AM, this old lady just about jumps in front of my car, lucky for both of us I was paying attention and waved her on.

What bugged me was, even after she heard my brakes she only kind of glanced, still didn't even look to see what was going on.

One more link for Chad

Looks like my Friendster pal, Chad, has been registered over at Truth Laid Bare's New Blog Showcase which appears to track links to articles. So, here's another to prop ya up in the ratings.

Physical Therapy: I

So, I have to admit, I went to this thing not expecting much more than a 1) stay off it, 2) ice it and 3) come back in a week so I can charge your insurance another $200. Let's just say I was pleasantly surprised.

First off, the guy who "runs the show" is an avid cyclist (like myself), a surfer, an MTB racer and many other things that I'm also into. So, he's cool shit. On top of that, he's also a very nice guy. That would have been enough to keep me satisfied, but no, he had the obligatory really really really cute girl working at the front desk. In any case, I'm sittin there chatting about how the injury occurred (my stupid ass pushing myself too hard - as usual), and he was having me walk around, probing the achilles and other shit. He sets me down to give me some ultrasound with some special anti-inflammatory gel. He looks at me, see's me checkin front desk girl out, and mentions, "Hey, why don't you come back here and help out Mr. Murphy with his ultrasound". WOOHOO! The "cool" factor of this guy just went up 10-fold. Hah. She comes over, starts preppin me, and we're just chattin away. Found out some fun stuff, but stupid me, I forgot to look for a friggin ring. Gahd-damn.

In any case, real nice girl, real pretty and seemed pretty damn cool. Gotta make it a point to try and get her # next time I head back there. I'm usually shy about shit like that, but I gotta get over my stupidity at some point, right?

Net net net, I'm catching the tendonitis at a very early stage, it hasn't yet traveled up the achilles itself, which would be a *very* bad thing (entailing surgery). Doc's got me on Vioxx, apparently some heavy anti-inflammatory prescription stuff. Stretch twice a day, ice twice a day, go easy on the tendon, I guess I can get some easy biking in (but no hills). I should be good to go in a couple weeks if I want to baby it.

I'll keep you schmoes posted.

Oh yeah, and keep your eyes posted tomorrow for a post on african ants. I saw a show tonight on these things that blew.my.mind. Heh.

"It appears we have a serial horse-rapist"

I shit you not, this appears to be a real story.

What is *almost* more disturbing is the AIM conversation that the story prompted. (names erased to protect the guilty - but you know who you are you sick sick sick fuckers! LOL)

[16:50] Pervert1: wth? they cant even come close to the lenght [sic] of a horses dick
[16:50] Friend: what?
[16:51] Pervert1: have you seen a horses dick in full eretion [sic]?
[16:51] Friend: ... yeah?
[16:51] Pervert1: its like 3-4 feet
[16:51] Friend: ... yeah?
[16:51] Pervert1: yeah
[16:51] Friend: I dont follow you...
[16:53] Friend: ?
[16:53] Pervert1: a human dick wont go deep enough
[16:53] Friend: for what?
[16:53] Pervert1: wasnt that guy doing the horses/
[16:53] Pervert1: ?
[16:53] Friend: yeah... not for the horses pleasure though! hahahahaha
[16:53] Pervert1: true haha
[16:53] Pervert1: didnt think about it that way

^ W.T.F part: II

NSFW maybe (??)

W.T.F.

Thanks Thrak for the link! lol BTW, what is it with you and animal porn? Dirty south man, dirty south!

Damn

Got my achilles checked out this morning.

Damn. Yes, this is what pushing yourself for an 18-mile hike in Yosemite will do to you. 4-6 weeks of PT 3-4 times a week or something stupid. First day is tomorrow. :/

Ahem

Heh. Honestly, if someone is cleaning the toilet *next* to you, WHO IN GODS NAME PISSES ON THEM? Additionally, could you imagine walking in on the degenerate smearing feces on the wall? ROFLMAO

File this under: People are sick, sick fucks.

Bush approval up

I'll admit, I'm no statistical genius here, but someone wanna re-read this AP poll and tell me what DOESN'T make sense.

Hint: It's in the fourth paragraph. ;)

Would someone please do the math there (I'm too lazy) and post up as to the percentage of liberals they "polled" vs. conservatives? My guess is something like 90/10 in order to get those kinds of results. Makes you wonder what is "actual" job performance satisfaction figures really look like.

Howard Dean is a douche: III

This interviewer is actually pretty good, it comes across to me like he's all, "I expect, and will not tolerate, your bullshit. Now answer the question." Dean, waffles and fluffs around a bit, but this guy sticks the question to him. And Dean, once again, sounds like an asshole. Heh.

And just because I'm bored

Two funny pics from this summer.

I.love.boobs. Not as much as a nice ass or legs, but boobs are a wonderful thing.

What the...

ef?!?!?!

This dirtball has been arrested 400 times and has had his drivers license suspended five times (for life!), and he's still out and about.

Holy sweet mary.

Wilderness pics!

WARNING:
These pictures are rather large - full resoultion on a 4 megapixel camera - basically not for the "bandwidth challenged". Enjoy!

Just gonna post a few of my more favorite pictures.

This first pic is closer to the top of the trail I took, from "Upper Pines" Campground, past the two falls, then up John Muir to Half Dome. This is actually coming back down, and is of a nice wooded trail - #1 or #2 on my list of favorite pics.

This second picture was also taken on the way down (as with all my pics) - close to one of the two falls (I forget which) was this scenic rock wall. Psh, whatever, I like it. :b

Third pic is a layout of one of the falls - the frozen water on the side of the falls was pretty cool. I can just imagine the first freeze of the year for this, must be totally beautiful.

The final picture I'm posting here is potentially my favorite. Interestingly enough this was taken on my drive OUT of the park on Saturday. I was paying more attention than I normally do and saw this serene river right off the side of the road, so I parked the car, jumped out, jumped a fence, and snapped this one. Came out pretty good IMO.

All things considered, a kick ass trip. Froze my ass off, busted up my achilles on my 18 mile (round trip) hike up to, and back from Half Dome. The drive to and fro wasn't too bad, about 6 going up, 7 coming back. Net net net, already thinking of planning a summer trip. Though the cold didn't bother me so much as to not do another winter trip, 1) I'd like to bring someone with me next time, 2) I hear there's a better "party scene" in the summer and 3) I'd like to be able to go with less clothing (not 15 layers).

Until then...

My ka-niffe

Big. Sharp. Illegal.