September 27, 2004

Good News and Bad News

I have good news and bad news to share with everyone.

The bad news is that, should the Almighty Green Bay Packers win on Sunday, it seems that Kerry is going to be our next Commander in Chief....well, yeah, OK, he'll hold the office of Commander in Chief. We all know that, in typical Kerry fashion, he will spend the greater part of each day trying to decide what he should eat for breakfast, and then whether to go with a gray or navy suit. You know, the important stuff.
If the Redskins lose or tie the game before the presidential election, the party in the White House gets ousted. A Redskins win is a win for the incumbent party, too. At least, that’s how it has played out in the past 18 presidential elections.
The Good news is that we now have empirical evidence to support something I have known since I first realized that there is such a thing as good and evil, just and unjust, a Green Bay Packer fan and a mere mortal human. This fundamental truth that some of us are fortunate enough to be born knowing is that, short of whatever Supreme Being may be out there in charge of things, the Green Bay Packers are unquestionably the most powerful force in the universe....and, mind you, they come in a very CLOSE second.
The chance that the games and elections results matching up in the last 18 elections is 1 in 263.5 million, more than 2,600 times higher than the chance of being killed by a lightning strike in a lifetime, said Dave Dolan, an assistant professor of statistics at the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay.
What's a person to do?

(Thank you to fatso for allowing me to use this forum as a guest poster to spread such critical information.)